Sorry about that, I’ve been busy. This last week was reading week at uni, which essentially is a week without lectures so that you can get some reading done and catch up/ get ahead before essays are set and deadline season begins. I didn’t do as well as I wanted on that front, but I did get a chunk of reading done, so it wasn’t too bad. On the other side of things, Alex came for a visit this last week and it has been really nice. He came up at the weekend and then we went out for Halloween! This year we had drinks at my place beforehand because hey, we don’t live together any more! It was quite weird, but it was nice too. My place is quite small, but it was nice to actually have the room full of people and music and Halloween decorations. I was an evil pixie/demon/devil thing this year. (Essentially, I wore a black dress with some red wings from Poundland with lots of red eyeshadow as countour all over my face.) It was a good night. I’m getting older though, the hangovers are getting a bit more disruptive these days, I may have to reassess what my alcohol limit is!
I watched Dallas Buyers Club for the first time. I cried. I don’t think you understand. I cried A LOT. Do you remember when I watched RENT for the first time? I cried that much. And this time I was in a public cinema, not even in my bedroom watching a film with my partner. I literally had tears spilling off my face and by the end of the film my entire face was wet, also the sleeves of my jumper. It was really really good. The screening was part of a film festival that my university does every year that is about education of mental health issues. (we’ll talk more about that later) and was followed by a short discussion about the topics and the film in general. It was a very good thing. I wouldn’t say that it was a good experience, or rewarding or any of those sorts of things, they don’t seem like appropriate words. It was enlightening, I suppose is a more appropriate word. The film is about a man in America who contracts HIV. It follows his life from slightly before his diagnosis and then afterwards. The story is ostensibly about the struggles of Americans to find and fund the medications that they need in order to recover, and simply live with HIV. It shows how the FDA and big pharma only look out for themselves and their businesses, rather than caring about the patients that they are selling the drugs to. This film is set in the past, but things have not changed much today. These things are companies, they are looking to make a profit and they will charge as much as they think that they can for the life-saving drugs that people need. If a person has something like HIV, a condition that can only be managed, not cured (as of yet) they can charge whatever they want. I did learn that today, in the UK, people who are diagnosed will have a normal life expectancy, but those people who contracted HIV in the past have a much lower life expectancy because of the number of drugs they have, effectively, been testing over the years. The long term effects of those medications are not yet known about as even now we are still learning what happens to long-time survivors. That aspect of the film makes me angry. HIV sufferers need these drugs and they’re dying every day from lack of access because of healthcare systems and the commercialisation and privatisation of them. They literally cannot afford to stay alive.
The last couple of weeks have been nice. It’s been nice to take some time to really settle in and figure out some new routines. I’ve been drinking lots of water and eating a lot of fruit. I’ve got used to the sound of loud trains going past in the middle of the night. I’ve left the flat almost every single day and that’s been tiring, but really good. If you didn’t already know, the outside is good for you. It feels like it’s properly Autumn now, it’s been cold and rainy with the occasional sunshiney day and it’s wonderful. It would be even better if I had a proper coat rather than just jackets here with me, but I’ll go home soon and get them. Ash gave me some fairy lights that she wasn’t using, so my room is lovely and cosy now. I’ve cracked out the autumn candles too because they smell like coffee and caramel and my kitchen is in my bedroom. It’s good to get rid of cooking smells. (And to replace them with more food smells…)
I have moved house, finally! I moved into a studio flat in student accommodation and it’s actually really lovely. I have my own little kitchen and my own little bathroom and it’s really nice to have this space to myself without having to share it in the slightest. It is nice to have my own self-contained little place that I can make my own for the next year. Ashleigh is just across the road and on my second night here I popped over for a brew, which was nice because I didn’t have a kettle until my third day. As I write this, my boxes are strewn around me after a visit from my parents and all I did was stop to get my kettle and my mugs unpacked. I have a lovely cup of tea.
I’m not looking forward to going back to uni and lectures over much, but I suppose that’s what I’m here for and I only have one year left. I’ve already started on all of my reading and making notes on some of the books, I started over the summer so that I could get at least a little bit of a head start. Being on a dual honours English course makes for a lot of reading each week, so I’m glad that I did that for future me. I’m sure that she’ll be grateful. I know her pretty well, and I think she’ll be pretty grateful at any rate. (If you want to know what books I’ve been reading this month and what I thought about them, come back on Friday for the monthly book chat)
I spent a lovely day in Manchester with Ash and Tom. It had been a little while since we were all together and so it was really nice to get out of the house and see them. It was just quite a nice day.
Then my aunt visited for a few hours and we talked a lot about books and feminism and fox hunting and psychology. It was really interesting and nice to see her. We don’t see each other very often at all, usually only a few times a year, because we all have our own lives and just get on with it. But it was lovely. She brought me a book aswell, which is great because we quite often have similar tastes in books, but also seem to know different books. She’s always good to get book recommendations from! She brought me a copy of Maya Angelou’s ‘I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings’, which has been on my reading list for a very long time. I’ve read it and loved it and made notes, but I’ll talk about my thoughts on it later. It was lovely to see her and I’m looking forward to seeing how her book club gets on!
For the last couple of weeks I have been organising my bedroom at my parents house. Trying to cram all my new stuff into my childhood bedroom that already had all of my childhood belongings in, not to mention the majority of my books, was quite the feat of effort. And it’s still not finished yet. I didn’t realise how much STUFF I had held onto over the years. I have letters, and teddies, and school reports from thirteen years ago. These things hold no meaning in my life anymore, so I’m getting rid of them, which is easy enough, but it just takes so much TIME. And I keep finding little deposits of these things in strange little places in my room where some previous version of me had squirrelled them away. Previous Alys doesn’t seem to have had any rhyme or reason to where she stored her things. But maybe that’s because she didn’t actually care about those things herself. And now I have to deal with her hoarding tendencies and get rid of all of the crap that she’s kept for the last twenty three years. Either way, that’s what I’ve been up to. When I’m not reading, because of course as soon as I actually had something to do I procrastinated like nobody’s business and read a lot.
So I finished reading The Moonstone by Wilkie Collins finally. I didn’t enjoy it. I wasn’t a fan right from the start, but it’s been on my list to read for about six years, so I persevered and then just kept going until I finished. I don’t really know what to say about it. It was paced slowly and I kept looking at the progress bar at the bottom of my kindle to see how far away from the end I was because it almost came to the climax of the story about three times. But then it just kept going! I think it’s safe to say that I’m glad that Kindle books are free if they’re out of print.
Then I went shopping with my mum and of course we went into Waterstones. I picked up Nod by Adrian Barnes and Flowers for Algernon by Daniel Keyes.
These last couple of weeks have been a really nice holiday. I went to the Lake District with Alex’s family and then stayed with them for a week in York. It was really nice to just have a break from everything. I even took a break from the internet while I was in the Lake district! (It wasn’t optional, there was no internet, but it didn’t bother me) It was so nice and simple to just be able to spend time with people and talk to them and spend time walking and reading and playing with the dogs. I enjoyed it a lot. Obviously living in a tent for a week isn’t always plain sailing, but other than some damp clothes and the occasional grumbly tumbly (and a sore ankle after climbing Stickle Tarn) it was wonderful.
I’ve always liked camping, or, I have good memories of liking camping- maybe I wasn’t actually so keen as a child, you’d have to ask my parents. Either way it was a really nice trip. We went walking, we were surrounded by beauty, and there was a really nice pub up the road from the campsite!
This week has been a week of reading and watching netflix. Tom moved house this week. Not properly, just he got his keys and we’ve all been over there to have a good look. It’s a really nice place, he has a lovely little room, with an ensuite and it’s going to look really cool when it’s all done and he’s all moved in. It’s made me excited for my new place. I know that I have to move back to my parent’s house first, but I can’t wait to get in there and start making it my own. I want to bring all of my plants and put up fairy lights and just have my things there. It’s going to be lovely and cosy.
I will actually be moving at the start of next week. Back home, and there will be a book cull. I have SO many books at my parent’s house, and I have to give them a good cull. I know there are some book people that keep every book they own forever, but I can’t do that. I have this idea that the way that I will die is being buried to death by an avalanche of books. Probably after they’ve been pushed over by my cat. Because I’m exactly that kind of person. But I won’t let that happen. My bookcases will be properly secured to the wall and my books will be limited to a manageable number. I can’t do much about the cat, cats will do what cats will do. If you follow me on Instagram you might see some of the process, I have a LOT of books to get through, as well as organising my entire bedroom again now that I’m moving back home, so that might be interesting. (Or at least amusing, when you see the state of my shelves)
I normally post these on Friday, but last Friday I was packing everything I owned into boxes and bags and sending it home to my parent’s house. So I didn’t really have much time. Moving house is a weird thing. It’s almost humbling to see your whole life in boxes, and when you’re packing it all up and you have to fit it into one car (and one small trailer) you have to decide what stays and what goes. Do you really need that dress that looks almost identical to that other dress? Do you really need all of these books? What is important to you?
It brings to mind all that stuff about minimalism again. I’m very aware that I wouldn’t be considered as a minimalist because of the sheer amount of stuff that I own, but it is interesting to think about which items that I own are bringing me enough joy to keep carting them around the country, and which ones don’t make the cut. It’s interesting to learn about yourself that way. I learned that I don’t need all of my books; the ones that I haven’t read, or will not read. I have learned that I can make do with a lot less clothes than I currently own. I have learned that I cannot do without my plants and the books that I do read/will read again. I have learned that I refuse to go without my nice skin cream that I use for my skin condition. I could use a cheaper cream, but I don’t want to. The cream that I use has a touch of luxury about it, it has a nice scent, it is not tested on animals, and I buy it from a company that I don’t mind giving my money too. My morals are something that mean something to me, and so I will continue to buy that cream that is a little on the expensive side, and instead save the money from all the clothes that I don’t need to buy.
So I’m still a student. I got the email the other day saying that I’m able to re-sit my third year so I’m just taking some time to let that piece of information settle in and find its place in my brain. i bought some books to celebrate. Cheap ones from The Book Depository, but good ones nonetheless. Or at least I hope that they will be good! I have high hopes. The first one arrived today and it’s a sort of sequel to the one I’m reading right now, so it’ll be good to be able to start reading it as soon as I finish what I’m reading. Which is what I have been doing this entire week. I have been reading Homo Sapiens by Yuval Noah Harari and The View From The Cheap Seats by Neil Gaiman. Both are non-fiction and I’m enjoying them immensely. The first is a history of humankind; a biological, anthropological, sociological view of humans throughout the life of our species. The second is a collection of speeches and essays that Neil Gaiman has written on a variety of subjects, mainly pertaining to fictions that he and other people have written. I have really enjoyed reading them alongside each other because the Gaiman book illustrates rather nicely a lot of the ideas in the Harari book. Harari discusses the ‘Thing’ that separates humans from other animals, and concludes that it is our capability to imagine.
To create fictions is inherently human (on this planet). It has been argued that language is the answer to what separates us from other animals, but scientists have proved that other animals use language. It has been theorised that it could be currency, but aside from the fact that other animals trade items, money is something that emerged from our root ability to imagine. I can’t explain it as well as in the book, so it’s something that I recommend you all to read. Fiction and imagining things extends from telling stories around the fire, to the imagining of big corporations as entities separate from the people that work for them. It’s a big business, this imagining thing.